In my country (part 2)…

…playing terrible Christian rock at 5.45am is just not the done thing

…‘meeting starts at 10am’ means just that

…rubbish goes in bins, which are collected by refuse trucks and taken to landfill sites

…pissing in public is only acceptable for the under-fives


Whereas in Nigeria…

…if you’ve got it [light], you flaunt it [by ‘sharing’ your godrock collection at top volume] whatever time of day or night it happens to be

…the meeting starts when everyone’s arrived (usually sometime after 12)

…rubbish goes wherever you decide to chuck it – out of the car window, on vacant plots of land in housing estates, in storm drains

…the world is your toilet. No, really. And I’m not just talking number ones [shudder]